Medieval steal-em-up Rustler: Grand Theft Horse is coming to PC Early Access in early 2021.
This top-down action game is, as the name suggests, a medieval take on the original Grand Theft Auto. It casts you as Guy, a brigand who’s determined to marry a princess, getting all the financial perks that involves. To this end, you rob, murder and ride your way through a mud-splattered world, doing everything from stealing horses through to ploughing dicks into a field.
We got our hands on Rustler earlier this year and were impressed by its absurd nature; in particular, were were tickled by the rather gruesome corpse-selling side activity and got a kick out of being able to hire our own personal bard.
We were a little surprised by how wide and regular the streets were, compared to the narrow streets of a real medieval settlement. That said, Rustler has you being pursued by siren-wearing horseback cops, so it’s not exactly going all in on realism.
If Rustler sounds like your kind of skull-smashing, dung-encrusted thing you can wishlist it on Steam and play it on Early Access in early 2021.