She Remembered Caterpillars Review
She Remembered Caterpillars is what would happen if your grade school art teacher also dabbled in geometric circuit puzzles.
Author: Christian Mincks
Christian recently earned a degree in Creative Writing and now spends almost all of his free time playing Nintendo games. He understands this makes him a generally unhireable person and is grateful to GameSpew for giving him a platform regardless. Christian is an amateur speedrunner, garage rocker, and cautious optimist with an affinity for collectathon platformers, action RPGs, and shooters with spunk. Favorite games: Majora's Mask, Banjo Tooie, We <3 Katamari.
Woodle Tree 2: Worlds Review
Believe it or not, I don’t particularly enjoy writing negative reviews. Some critics get a kick out of unloading snark and sarcasm over the games they play, but not me. I get stuck thinking about the developer: the message they wanted to send, the entertainment they hoped to provide. But at the end of the…
Featherpunk Prime Review
Here’s the pitch: You’re a Cyber-Flamingo and all your buddies have been birdnapped. It’s time to storm the Cybirdroid Headquarters with an arsenal of bulky weaponry. Dash, boost, jump, and shoot your way through flashy, neon, randomly generated floors while a kickin’ soundtrack underscores your soiree of massacre. Overcome large patterned bosses, uncover secret dataspheres, and…
Lion Quest Review
Let me start off this review by saying Lion Quest, the game I’ve been playing for the past week, is not at all what I expected it to be. The Steam page touts that it’s a “zen platformer” in a “3D world navigated in 2D”, with space-time travel, mind control, and huge levels. Yet, despite the guaranteed zen, it also…
Near Death Review
Something felt downright wrong about playing Orthogonal Games’ Antarctic survival simulator Near Death in a temperature-controlled apartment in an ozone-depleted city in the middle of a blazing summer with a heated saltwater pool right in my backyard. There’s some latent guilt to guiding your pilot protagonist across the most dangerous landscape on the planet with only…
Lovely Planet Arcade Review
Lovely Planet Arcade is a twitch shooter that will kick your butt, pat your wounds, and give you butterfly kisses that turn into literal butterflies.
The Deed: Dynasty Review
The year is 1401. William Bruce approaches the mansion of the man who ruined his life with one goal in mind. He grabs an axe and a firepoke, and… oh, dinner time. William sits upon these sharp implements at the dinner table with people he’s never met, saying nothing, plotting, scheming. After dinner, he climbs to the roof…
Crimson Room: Decade Review
If you grew up during the 2000s, chances are you made your way to websites like Newgrounds or Ebaumsworld. Working around school internet firewalls during IT lessons or computer lab, you likely laughed at classics such as “Schfifty Five” and “The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny”. This era also produced many browser-based escape-the-room games, including…
Kirby: Planet Robobot Review
If you press the Start button in Kirby: Planet Robobot while Kirby is in his default form, there’s an interesting message on the pause screen. It reads “Kirby… possesses infinite power and can inhale enemies to copy their abilities.” That second part we all know. It’s the first claim that gets me. This is the first game…
Zero Time Dilemma Review
When Nine Hours Nine Persons Nine Doors released back in 2010, it was unlike anything I had ever experienced. Sure, the puzzles differed little from browser-based escape-the-room games, but the storytelling shocked me. From humble, SAW-like beginnings, the narrative engaged me with its quirky cast, then tossed in smart twists based on math and quantum physics. Virtue’s Last Reward continued the trend…
Mecha Ritz: Steel Rondo Review
The bullet hell shmup always been a game genre that fascinated me. Sadly, I have not played enough games in the genre to call myself anything close to an expert. Still, I’ve watched the insane no-damage Touhou boss runs on YouTube. And, like a small child deciding they’ve got what it takes to be a meteorologist after…
Star Fox Zero Review
You know when you and a group of friends all go to see a movie just to laugh at it? Everybody comes out of the theater with mocks and jibes, and they’re all on the same page because they’re unified against the movie… except there’s that one person who pipes up from the back of…
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